SPEAKER_02: 0:05

Hey y'all, this is the Authentic Heart Podcast, and my name is Amber Westerman, your host. I'm so excited to share today's guests with you, but before we get started, I like to draw an affirmation at the beginning of each episode to just help us start our week off on the right foot. Alright, our affirmation for this week is my dreams are possible because God gifted them to me. Hmm. Alright, I want you to just like tune in. If you're not driving, close your eyes for a minute and think about what your biggest dreams are, or if you haven't really dreamt in a while. What were your dreams as a kid? What are some dreams that you've put on the back burner? Just tune in to the feeling that they bring if you think about pursuing them. So I just want to say that's like one powerful way that I like to use affirmations is tuning into the feeling of inspiration, of joy, bliss. Tuning into the things that we feel whenever we listen to our heart. Because that feeling is such a core part of manifesting a life beyond our wildest dreams. And I think this is just such a beautiful affirmation, really, to kind of start the new year with. So what are what are your dreams that you have right now, even for the new year? And just keep tuning into that. And I would love to invite you to start every day over the next week or two with this feeling and with this affirmation. Maybe write it down if you have a pen and paper and put it on your mirror. That's one thing that I do. So I hope that gives you a really good start to your week. We're gonna go ahead and get started with this guest, my beautiful friend Amanda Limbroso, I believe is how you pronounce her last name. She recently got married, so she is one of my dearest friends and one of my favorite people on the planet because she just exudes light, and she is just a light to anyone that crosses her path. And she's gained so much wisdom over the short amount of time that she's been here on the planet. And I am just so excited to share that wisdom with you. So we're gonna go and get started with Amanda. I would love to start with you just talking about your journey. I feel like you're one of the most inspiring people I know and one of my favorite people on the planet. And you have just such a beautiful, bright heart. And I'd love to just share with my audience. You have like manifested your biggest dreams and are continuing to, and it's just so inspiring to me. And so, yeah, if you don't mind just sharing a little bit about your journey and what's gotten you to where you are, and yeah, we'll go on from there.

SPEAKER_00: 3:05

I would love to. I would love to. I'm so honored to be to have been asked to be on your podcast, knowing you as intimately as I do, and knowing just where you're gonna go and how many lives you're gonna touch. I feel super, super honored. So just wanted to start with that. I am have recently become a mother nine-ish months ago. Yeah, so the where I'm at now is um a mother to a sweet angel baby daughter, Adeline Rose, married to the man beyond my wildest dreams. Such a fascist family. I yeah, I I adore our little, we call it our little Ohana.

SPEAKER_02: 3:50

Ah, I love it.

SPEAKER_00: 3:52

Yeah, we got engaged in Maui. So we started dreaming of our our family way before then, but definitely while we were there. Um and yeah, living in a home that we designed and built in eastern Tennessee. We looked all over the the world and the country to find the perfect place to settle down and raise a family and have a little mini homestead, and just return to a simpler way of living, a sane way of living, connected to the land way of living. And it it's very interesting because the chapter that I'm in now is less about dreaming more, like more dreams and bigger dreams, and it's it's a settling into the perfection and bliss and gratitude of the life that I'm that I already have, and really I love that relishing in all the small moments and finding the magic in the mundane and living at a slower pace, especially as a mom, a full-time mom, which I'm so so so honored to put all of my presence and focus into our daughter and our family and nourishing our family, and it's the greatest honor and greatest responsibility. And so, but the journey here was a wild one and a and a long one, and I know it's a big question, yeah. It is that was like a snapshot of where I'm at, and then yeah, the journey of like who I am and how I got here is I have this insatiable uh interest in learning, and so even in college, I changed my major three times. I'm like, maybe I want to do this, maybe I want to do this, maybe I want to do this. But in the end, I got my degree in psychology, which fits me well because I love people and I'm fascinated by people, and I'm fascinated with personal development and like how to really expand our consciousness and figure out, discover, create. Like, why are we why are we even here? What is the purpose? How can we make the most out of the time that we've been given here on earth? And so that sent me down so many rabbit holes. And so you can kind of guide me on which ones you would like to touch on because there's so many. What would be most beneficial maybe to your specific audience?

SPEAKER_02: 6:36

Yeah, my specific audience is here to find a place in their life of where you are, really, of being like feeling happy and like satisfied with their life and just wanting to be in a place of gratitude. And so I like I dream of helping people get there, and that's something that I am constantly working on in myself. And I love that you started out with that because I feel like you know, that's a big belief of mine and something that we've worked on together is Amanda used to be my life coach of sorts or love coach, I guess is what you would call is what you called yourself. And so we've done a lot of intimate one-on-one work together. And I love that you started out with that because that is like really at the essence of manifesting dreams, right? And like manifesting your dream life is loving where you are now, finding how you can love where you are now and like relishing in every moment. And it helps us to manifest our wildest dreams. So that's something that I've always been is also just really passionate about consciousness and trying to unfold it all and just understand it all, which we're never gonna understand it all, right? So, what are the biggest key points that you've learned throughout the journey to get you to where you are now?

SPEAKER_00: 7:59

Mm-hmm. I love this question. So, oh one of the most pivotal, impactful experiences that I ever had on my journey was called the Landmark Forum. And it's this three-day immersive transformational experience. And that was a turning point in my life where I started to become aware and not only aware, but admit to other people and especially myself, where I had been being inauthentic in my life. That was like the start of a journey towards authenticity, and you cannot live an authentic life until you admit, own, acknowledge all the ways that you're being inauthentic. And we live in a society where it's almost like conditioned or normal to be inauthentic, to like just when someone asks you how you are, you answer without probably any authenticity. And how often do we get asked that question so much? And so true to it's I yeah, I started to really pause when people would ask me questions and check in before answering. And I remember one friend that I had many, many years ago in Austin, she said she's like, it impacted me so much when you started to do that because it's not a social norm to like someone asks you a question and you don't immediately respond. It's like I would take a breath and I would check in so that I could give a genuine, authentic answer. And she was just like, Wow, that really like stuck with me. And so that was such a confronting practice exercise that they had us do because the list started to get real long of all the ways and relationships that I was being inauthentic. And so I started to clean that up little by little. And the challenging part of being on a journey of authenticity, returning to our true self, a spiritual journey, is a lot of times when we start to wake up, we realize how much is inauthentic and unconscious, and so your entire life starts to shift and things start to fall away and things start to like be destroyed so that they can be rebuilt on truth. And that specific chapter journey can be so intense, unsettling, ungrounding, isolating. But it's part like it's part of the journey. And so even in in that chapter, if the thing that helped me the most is leaning on trust, like trust that spirit like has my back, is benevolent, and everything is working out for me for my highest good. And if it's it and if it's not this, then it's something even better. I would fall back on that often. Let's say like a relationship was like getting blown up and destroyed because I was actually totally inauthentic in that relationship. And I'm like, it's heartbreaking to go through that. But then if I if I can fall back on the core belief of, okay, you know what? If it's not this, then I don't know how or when, but it's gonna be something even better, and that's something to just practice in your mind over and over and over because there's so many opportunities for that, but really it brings so much peace. Like, let's say you lose a job or you lose a friend, or you get hurt, or like there's just so many opportunities that you can lean on trust versus the victim mindset of why is this why is this happening to me? Like, why am I going through this? Like, I'm never gonna get through this. This is so hard. Like, why me versus like you can ask the same question in a different energy, like, you know what? Like, why me? Like, ooh, like what does spirit have in store for me? Like, how is this strengthening me? Like, just and my favorite frequency to play with is beyond what we can imagine, right? So it's kind of like, okay, if you can play with trust and it's a practice, and you do it a little bit at a time, you don't fake it, you know, you just like okay, how much can I trust in this moment? And you experiment, like you pray, and then your your prayer gets answered, and you trust a little bit more, and you do that over and over and over until you're like literally God answers all prayers, and and that's a beautiful state, state to be in.

SPEAKER_02: 12:45

And I love that because I feel like like I resonate so deeply with you on the trust, and that's been like a path, you know, that I've been following for so long, too, is just I feel like one of the most beautiful paths you can take as a human is one of just not knowing what's coming and being okay with that. And that is something that I continue to learn over and over and over again. And I feel like a lot of people, especially here in America, because we've been trained to live life a certain way, we get stuck in this need-to-know mindset, or like I have to have my life figured out, or like I have to have my finances in order, like my I have to have a partner right at this time in my life, whenever I, you know, and and I think that it that mindset can really push us away from our heart center and from what like God has in store for us. And we'll keep running into, at least I know this in my own life, if I'm like running off course of my purpose, I'll start running into obstacles in my life and things will start showing me that I'm forcing something that's not that's not right for me. And I think a lot of people can get stuck in that and feel like they have to keep forcing and keep forcing. What would you advise to somebody who is in a situation like that where they've just been stuck in this like mundane for so long and feeling like they're having to constantly force their way into life and to making things happen? If if some if like trust and surrender is something that's very new to somebody of surrendering to the unknown, what would you say to help get somebody kind of in a mindset of being able to do that?

SPEAKER_00: 14:45

Yeah, I I love this question because I feel like we've all been at that place at some point or over and over and over where we like we're on track and then we get off track and then we go down this spiral and then we're like, wait, how the hell did I get here? And now, more importantly, how do I get myself out?

SPEAKER_02: 15:08

So true.

SPEAKER_00: 15:09

Yeah, I think that happens. I like to view life as this upward spiral journey, but on the way up, it's like up and like up and down, up and down, up and down, up and down. But overall, from like a wider perspective, it's still you're still ascending and things are working out. But I would say if you're in one of those, I was actually literally just thinking about this today. Um how I was thinking about Abra Abraham Hicks teachings and like trauma healing and and how certain things get activated in our lives because I kind of went through this cycle recently where I realized the most important thing is our our state. Tony Robin talks about it a lot, like your state of mind, how much control we have over our state, like our energetic frequency, how alive we feel. Because even like he'll do an experiment in his live events where he's kind of like, you know, physically hunch over and put your head down and notice how you feel, and then stand up straight with your chin up and your hands down and your chest proud and notice how you feel. Like literally, you can instantly shift your state. And so I would say that is step number one. Because if you're in a rut in your life, you're in a rut in your mind, and you're the only person who can break that pattern, do like a pattern interrupt. And so things that started to come to mind were breath work, like do something to break the pattern and to get out of the mind and into the body. Because spirit is like right there as soon as we do that, like it doesn't have to be this long road of all of this stuff that you have to do. It can be, it can be right now, and so like even just looking up a guided breath work on YouTube or emotional freedom technique tapping, like doing something that's moving energy or a cold, an ice bath, like something that just gets you so out of your freaking head and into your body, and your state will change, and then from that new elevated frequency, you'll still be in the exact same circumstance, but you'll have an elevated view. And I think that's what happened to me recently is I I the mind is like a garden. I was like thinking about this today. You have to constantly tend to a garden. If you just coast the weeds will take over, the negative thoughts will come back, the trauma loops, the the anxiety, the whatever, all the things that you thought you had overcome, you have, you just have to get back to a certain frequency. And so it's kind of like sometimes we think, oh, we need to like heal all this trauma, do all this stuff. And I was realizing why Abraham says, No, just think different thoughts. And I was resist I was resistant to that for a long time, and now I'm like, oh, like she's saying that's actually not necessary if you maintain your state at a certain level and then just keep like trekking up the mountain from there. Like you can do all the trauma healing and feel better and then get to a better state, or you can just skip all that and like jump jump up and down and do a happy dance and see how you feel, like for like 10 seconds, you'll instantly feel better. So I think sometimes we forget how much power we have, how much control we have over our state, and how amazing that we can shift realities and elevate our life so quickly when we just do it. Like just get into the ice bath, don't think about it, do some breath work, and then just go.

SPEAKER_02: 19:15

And even if it's just like tiny moments, right? Like it doesn't even have to be like a planned prolonged time of doing this, like it the more often you can do it in little moments throughout the day, I feel like the the better it is for your mind, right? Yeah, I'm curious. So, like whenever I've kind of talked about this in like personal conversations with friends and stuff, I've had some come back at me with being like, Well, there's a level of like toxic positivity in that too. Have you ever had anyone say that to you? Or like, not to me. I'm curious of your thoughts.

SPEAKER_00: 19:55

I don't think, but um, yeah, it's it's it's it's near. Nuance, right? A statement like that is very general. So it's very like specific to different people's situation because you have to also like face your life. Like if you're doing it's like it's in the balance between you can't do all this stuff to avoid doing the hard things, that's different than like just like wallowing in what your past versus maybe you know you can't pay your bills or something. It's like okay, you need to like actually get real with your current situation, meet yourself where you're at, take care of yourself on like mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, financially, and then like build from there. So you can't just be like, you know, like I'm gonna be a millionaire tomorrow. It's like you can say, I'm gonna be a millionaire, I'm already a millionaire, it's just a matter of time, but I'm gonna go get a job because I have bills. You know what I mean? So it's like it's it's a balance. There's not, I don't think there's toxicity in positivity, there's toxicity avoidance of the hard, real, the hard conversation that you don't want to have, you know. The so and I've noticed that tendency in myself that's like, okay, I'll just go, you know, like watch this YouTube video or read this book or take this course or go to this conference. And I'm like actually avoiding the shame that I have of like the hard conversation that don't that I don't want to have with my husband. It's so you gotta check yourself, you know.

SPEAKER_02: 21:44

It's like okay, so true. Yeah, it's so true. I felt like that's that was like a huge thing that you really helped me through in the time that we work together, is learning how to have the hard conversations with people in my life in a healthy way that's like not triggering. And I like it's kind of funny. I almost feel sometimes now I I actually had to do this last week. I had to do, I'd love for you to talk about the alpha thing too. Um I actually had to do this last week with somebody, and it like excites me when I get to use it, even though it's like something that's not really an easy thing for me to do. And it's a very emotional, emotional process for anyone to go through. And it's it's challenging because you never know how somebody's gonna respond. But um I love it. I love that I have this tool that you gave me that helps me navigate challenging conversations with people because I feel like I know in myself that can be one of the hardest parts about like navigating life and the unknown is communicating with other people in an authentic way whenever it's something that it doesn't feel like it's serving you. Because I feel like that's that's one thing that can really get in the way is people pleasing, right? Pleasing other people can can cause us to get in our own way of the abundance that life can provide. So yeah, I'd love for you to talk a little bit about that if you would like to.

SPEAKER_00: 23:22

Yeah, I'd love to. I'm curious how it went. Did the other person respond well or how you thought, or how did that interaction go?

SPEAKER_02: 23:32

Yeah, it kind of went through a full conversation, but I I had to do it multiple times with this person because of their responses, but I could tell like the level of emotional maturity wasn't fully there to respond in uh a fully like understandable way, I guess. And so I don't know if that friendship is honestly still there, but it wasn't serving me to like at the point of where I felt like I needed to speak up. That friendship was draining me. So it was felt like it was very necessary to speak up. And I'm at peace with where it is. I don't feel like I said anything offensive. I spoke my heart and let them know what was right for my heart in our friendship and what didn't feel right. And if they didn't want to make peace with that, then like we'll just move on, you know?

SPEAKER_00: 24:35

Yeah. So I I love, I love that you shared that because that's also something that's kind of not talked about a lot or kind of tamboo this thing, like friends forever. I feel like we grew up with like little best friend charms, you know, and it's like best friends forever. I'm like, there's like unhealthy friendship dynamics too, especially the longer you're on the personal development journey. There and I had another friend recently who is going through the exact same thing with a friend and kind of like noticing where she wasn't speaking up and like expressing her boundaries, and then when you do that, it's the real test of the friendship because then the friend like didn't honor her boundaries, so now she's like okay, well, maybe like having to really evaluate this person's energy in her life and if it's aligned and if it's not, and I love that you're just like I'm at peace, and you know, if we part ways, that's okay. Like it's there's an abundance of love and friendship and all the things.

SPEAKER_02: 25:40

There is, and I feel like we're we all enter each other's life for a reason, and there's a time and place for certain relationships. And if the the thing has happened that was meant for our relationship to be known, then you know it's it's okay to move on.

SPEAKER_00: 25:56

Yeah, definitely. Yeah, so I would love to share the tool. It's a very powerful one. I have to credit um the woman who I learned it from, Melanie Anne Lair. She has a brand called Alpha Femme, and so this is her form of communication when you need to have a hard conversation. You go through the acronym of Alpha, and so each letter stands for a different word. So you always start with A, appreciation. I was telling my husband recently, I'm like, because he often will share ways that I can do something better, and I appreciate that. He's always challenging me to grow, and I'm like, you could you could start with just like a like a little phrase of appreciation, which he's constantly sharing appreciation, but I'm like, okay, but the timing of like appreciation right before quote unquote criticism or something that I can do better might land a little bit softer, and so he's been practicing, he's been practicing that, and I appreciate it. So there's just something so you have to find genuine something that you can genuinely express appreciation for, and this is if you have a problem with someone that you want to discuss it in a non-triggered way. So you start with you start with the appreciation, and then the L is for long-term vision. So let's say, for example, you and your friend, you're like, I value our friendship and I want us to continue being friends, or you know, whatever the dynamic of the relationship is, a boss. Like, I really like working here and I want to continue to contribute to this company or a marriage, you know, like I want to be happy at our 50-year wedding anniversary, you know, like whatever. It's like the long-term vision. And then uh P, then you state the problem, and then H is happiness for both. So you want it to be a win-win scenario. So you want to really be thinking this through before you bring the conversation. And then the A at the end is you ask for what you want, you ask for what you need, which is in itself that one letter is like, oh my god, you know, especially for I don't know, women, it's like like it's okay, it's okay, and it's important to practice knowing what we even need, and then asking for what we need. That's like a huge step. But yeah, if you go through that whole journey, it will blow your mind. I encourage everybody to like right now in your mind, think of that one person who you could have that conversation with and just practice writing out what you would say and just notice how it feels, and then go have the conversation.

SPEAKER_02: 28:46

Yeah, I mean, and that's what I've done every time that I use that method that you gave me is I'll I'll honestly just write them a letter and I'll either like like send a voice note of the letter or just send a text, or it just depends on the situation and the person, or I'll read it to them in person if it's you know that intimate of a relationship. But yeah, it is it has been like one of the most powerful tools, I feel like, in my relationships that I have, and even some of my close friends. I remember when I was in Tennessee, I used it on a friend that was it is a dear, very still a very dear friend of mine. And I was just needing some like I was needing to do less with them. Like they were wanting to plan all these things, and I loved that she loved hanging out with me and like wanted to do all these things with me. But I was like, my life is so busy right now, I need to take a step back from all the planning. And I used that method on her, and she like saw my heart and where I was coming from, and she was like, Okay, well, I'm going to then insert myself into your schedule in a way that works for you. And she like we went and got nails together when I had to get my nails done or something for a photo shoot. Like it was just it's such a beautiful method, and it will, I feel like, show you your true friendships and it will show you what's not a true friendship as well. And people might leave you for it, and that's okay. The right ones will stay, right?

SPEAKER_00: 30:26

Which is extremely valuable to know. I feel like when I work with clients, one of the first things I do is like an energetic audit of like where are you most draining your energy relationship-wise, you know? Because if we can plug all the energy leaks, then you have all this vitality and energy and creativity to do the things that you know you really want to do that will make you happy, that will make you fulfilled. Um, but that's where we have to start. And I feel like a lot of times we don't even realize how much our energy is getting drained until something kind of big happens and it's kind of like a smack in the face. But the trick is to be more and more subtly in tune with our energy and how dynamics feel. One of the most powerful questions I ever started to ask myself over and over and over is is this nourishing for me? I went on this nourishment journey of like this soft feminine approach to life and healing and love. And so, you know, like after I hung out with a friend, like, was that nourishing for me? Or do I want to go to this event? Will that be nourishing for me? Do I want to put this in my body? Will that be nourishing for me? And it just like totally shifted my whole orientation to life. And life became so freaking nourishing. And I started to say no a lot more than I did leading up to that question, that lens of so you can choose whatever lens you want, like what feeling is most important to you that you crave, and start making your decisions based on ooh, like is that gonna cultivate or invoke more of this feeling that I really want to have?

SPEAKER_02: 32:16

Right. And that's powerful. That's like another easy, yeah, that's another easy tool to take away, like how you were talking about earlier. Like, the first thing you would suggest for somebody is to like start sitting up more and like owning, owning that power and feeling that feeling more. And um another one is great of just like asking yourself in every moment, like, is this nourishing for me? That's something that I've actually been going through lately because you know, me with my with all my music things that I have going on as an independent artist, we have we wear so many hats, we're our own marketing person. I mean, it's any really any small business, right? You do all the things yourself, and there's a never-ending to-do list, and I can easily, as you know, get caught up in it and exhaust myself. And something that I've been working on these last few weeks, which was that conversation with my friend, was the result of me feeling into this of is this nourishing me? And I've just been trying to like weave out, even in my my business with music, like what are the things that are not nourishing me right now? Because I am I have so many things to do, but if I just focus on nourishing myself, those things will like naturally get done, like whenever I'm in more in a flow, right? And yeah, so I yeah, that was part of that that conversation. And then oh my gosh, I just had a train of thought with that, and it's totally gone, but that's okay.

SPEAKER_00: 34:00

That's okay, because I have a question. I have a question. I'm curious how you navigate all the things that you need to get done, like discipline with nourishment. Like, is there things that you need to do that needs to get done that don't necessarily nourish you? Or if you've done your like self-care meditation afternoon nap because you're a projector, um then like you come into the things that you need to do with a different energy and there's not as much resistance. Like, what's that balance for you?

SPEAKER_02: 34:34

Yeah, so one of the things that my team had suggested me doing that I I like to a certain degree, I take it with a grain of salt, everything, right? Is to write everything down on my calendar, like every minute of every day. And that felt a little overwhelming to me. But what I've done is I schedule in my calendar an about 30-minute to an hour time frame to go through my calendar, to look at my to-do list and put all the things on my to-do list in time slots on my calendar. And that helps me spread it out so that I don't have to think of think about them. But before I do that, I first put in my calendar, I'm going on, I'm gonna do my morning routine, which is like one to two hours of just like sitting and being. And then I'm gonna go and do um, I'm gonna spend an hour moving my body, whether it's a long walk or it's a run and a workout. And then I'm going to like I schedule, I prioritize me first. And then I fit in where and then habit stacking is one of the things too. Like my as a singer, I I am supposed to be doing vocal warmups every day, and I need it to keep my voice strong and nourished. And so I will do that on my drives during the day. I'll like go to my, I'll schedule my chiropractor late morning after my workout and stuff so that I can drive there and do my vocal warmups and drive back and work on my vocal warmups. So that's I I've kind of built this habit of prioritizing me before my to-do list. And then where I have space in my calendar, I add the to-dos. And sometimes they don't get done because sometimes like I will have a headache or something, and I want to respect my body and my energy before anything, and I might have to push it off a little bit, and I think that's okay. But as long as I have them, like I keep one to-do list on my Monday, and that to-do list is in my scheduled time slot of working on my calendar for the week. I I put those to-dos throughout the week, and that just really helps me be able to get the things done, feel more in flow and in sync, and also, you know, just be okay if things don't happen exactly as is planned, because that's just that's part of it too.

SPEAKER_00: 37:07

But yeah, which is so freaking huge. Like you say it from such an embodied place of just so much peace, so much grace, so much acceptance, so much flow, so much like self-compassion, but that is so monumental. And I love you also just spoke about like how in flow you are with your day and your schedule. And I know for anyone listening, that took a long time, a lot of experimenting, a lot of messing it up, figuring it out, getting overwhelmed. Yeah, and then you and then you nail it, and then something totally comes in and you have to rearrange it again, you know. Exactly. Yeah, and so but I think that's the key is like your approach, because it is always gonna be changing, and and to yeah, just if you have the value though of like me first, nourishment first, body first, then you know, okay, but what about does guilt creep in? Like what what what starts to happen overwhelm when let's say your body really needs you, and then you're feeling like really behind. Is there a certain point where you start to get like that piece starts to be tested? And then how do you I'm curious how you approach?

SPEAKER_02: 38:35

Yeah, it can. For me, one that comes to mind right now that I have been dealing with is social media because I've kind of taken a step back from posting social media because I just have felt, you know, overwhelm is a common thing that I feel in my life, and I have felt overwhelmed with the amount of like expectation that is put on, you know, that I put on myself as a business owner and as a musician. And there's there like social media is just so important for growing as an artist, and you have to stay consistent and in creative ways. But I have over I recently had overwhelmed my schedule to where I I feel burnt out creating, like I can't come up with fun, unique ideas, and I'm not gonna post on social media inspiring content if if it's not if I'm not feeling inspired. I just I refuse to like post something fake, you know? And so what I actually did was I deleted all the social media apps on my phone, which has felt so incredible. I think it's been almost two weeks now that I haven't had it on my phone, and I only allow myself to I I will read download. Download them on my phone for very short amount of time every day, only when I'm sitting in front of my computer working and needing social media to like communicate with people or post a story. And then as soon as I get up from my computer, I delete them again. And it's a little extra work on there to do it, but that has brought so just social. I I just can tend as an artist, I can tend to see all of the other beautiful art and music things that are happening out there and compare myself and compare my work ethic. And I feel like that is like one of my biggest things that stops me from having inspiration and creativity is the comparison, which is so silly because we're all so unique and we all have beautiful gifts to contribute to the world, but it makes me feel like I'm not doing enough. And so deleting the socials has given my mind more space to just be and think again. And I've felt a lot less overwhelmed, and I've been okay with I just have told myself like I'm actually taking a break over the holidays. This is this has been pre-recorded way before it's gonna be released, but I told myself I'm taking a break over the holidays, and I told I told my team as well that I'm taking a break from social media, and I am going. It's interesting because I'm I'm about to release a new song that is about kind of like returning to the freedom we feel as a child and the the like authenticity and you know what I mean, inner peace that we feel as a child, and it feels so inauthentic to me to be releasing a song like that when I'm not in a grounded space, and so I my team actually like suggested to me that I take a road trip. And with my like my brother just moved back to Texas, and I've been spending some more time with him, and he's been helping me with recording some video content for socials, and they were like, why don't you go on a road trip with your brother over the winter? And I was like, Oh my gosh, that actually sounds kind of fun. And so I reached out to him. He's like, Oh, I'm actually already going on a road trip to Breckenridge if you want to come with our cousins. And so now we are like planning out this really fun road trip. And yeah, I don't really remember now where we started with that, but I just feel like uh it's something that just has been a really big focus of mine. That I guess about what, 20 minutes ago, we were talking about like like leaning into the things that are nourishing and weeding out the things that are not. And I think weeding out the things that are not have been one of the like first steps for me in the overwhelm I've been facing this past month. And it has been allowing me more space to lean into the things that feel more nourishing, and like like one of the things that feels the most nourishing for me right now is collaborating musically. I've been playing with so many people. I'm like developing a band to back my music, and it is so freaking fun. We can't even get together nearly as much as I want to, and that's okay. But it's so I'm just like focusing on doing those things now. But yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 43:43

Even when you just when you just talked about your band, how you lit up. I was like imagining you on an energetic frequency, you just started to like and imagine how magnetic that is, you know. So this is the whole like stopping forcing and starting flowing more, and this is the path exactly what you're talking about. And I could relate so hard to noticing how impacted I am when I'm on socials and I'm seeing maybe coaches in my space doing what they're doing at a very, very high level and comparing and questioning and like almost it's almost like conditioning myself to aim for that. But when I started to step away from what everyone else is doing, all the amazing things that they're doing in their life, and got real quiet and just was with my own energy, my own heart, my own desires, my own fears, my own dreams. I deeply contemplated what success looks like and means to me, which I feel like I've had a hard time accessing the truth of that answer because I'm constantly allowing other people's thoughts, energy, actions, results in my field. So it almost distorts my own pure connection. Because imagine, you know, like there's like all these people around you, and they're talking and you're hearing all these different voices and seeing all these things versus just being in nature by yourself. Like, imagine how it would be so much easier to like have your own direct connection. And mine is not financial at all, even though I've been kind of like I follow these coaches that have like insane financial results, and I just took a step back from that, and I'm like, what's actually genuine and authentic for me is success means being fully like authentically expressed and like even like feeling all my emotions and expressing all my emotions and especially in my inner circle, in my marriage, and you know, being the best self I possibly can for my daughter, for our daughter. And so it was just like my definition was so simple and so intimate and so close to my heart. It was more around my full expression, like as a human being. What does it mean to be successful? To be to me, like fully expressed, and that's a journey, you know, that I'm on and will continue to be on, probably for the rest of my life. Um expressing more and more and more, discovering like really how powerful we are, or what what is true for us now, and so versus constantly thinking about oh, how can I get my business to this level? Like it was actually inauthentic to me, and really accepting that. Yeah, because Gary, I Gary V said a speech recently at college graduation, and he was like, go do the thing not that you think that you should, but that is actually authentic to you, and that's a process to find out like what actually is that, and it took me, I feel like it took me so long to really slow down long enough to let that answer deep inside me bubble to the surface, and it's a lot simpler than all of these grandiose dreams that I was comparing myself to, and kind of thinking that that's what I want or should have, and just letting all that go and being like, if I have shame or fear, or my heart closes in my marriage, and I lean in to courage and actually express, even if I'm like nervous or you know, not sure how he's gonna respond, or you know, break through generational patterns to like my authentic self. That oh my god, that love feeling of success is far exceeds like financial milestones that I've hit. And so I'm like, oh, that's actually my north star. So you have to find your own north star.

SPEAKER_02: 48:33

It's so true, and I love that you bring that up because I feel like a lot of people's like biggest goals are financial related, and I think something that can often be missed in creating those goals and working towards those goals is why. Because money is just a form of energy, right? It's like there's nothing, like it's not even pretty, like there's nothing shiny about it other than the fact that it can bring you a certain life. So I feel like it's more important to not necessarily have money as like the thing that's on your goal list and have like what's behind that financial number that you're wanting to hit? Like, why, like, what is the life that you think that's gonna create for you? Because you might be able to create it without that number, you know? And so, like, why not lean into the thought of those things that you want to create in your life better and start embodying them more and then stressing yourself out to work towards this number that's just really completely fake and made up. Money is really just like a made-up system, right? Completely. It's wild.

SPEAKER_00: 49:53

Yeah, and that goes back to everything that we've talked about. Like, like you let's say you have this financial goal goal, and then you're forcing yourself, pressuring yourself, and then maybe you hit it, and Tony Robbins says, like, success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure. Like, you'll get there and then you'll feel so empty inside, versus being like, Okay, imagine I win the laundry, you know, what does my life look like? Okay, how do I think I'll feel? Okay, I actually think I'll feel really nourished. Okay, let me focus on that now. And then you're just like so the journey is so enjoyable, and maybe it takes you in this totally different direction, but you're just blissed out, and it's better than you could have imagined over there.

SPEAKER_02: 50:40

Yeah, it's so true. All of this, oh my gosh, it's all so powerful and really inspiring. Oh, I'm loving this. Me too. Oh my God. Um, so I feel like I want to do a whole nother episode with you because I also want to do like a whole episode on birth stuff, even though I would love isn't fully my audience. It's just like mind-opening things that this beautiful soul has discovered in the realm of motherhood, and it needs to be shared with the world. How about you just like let us know what you are up to now? And like even with like your your work, I know you talked about you are a mother, a beautiful baby girl. Um, but yeah, share us what what are you up to now?

SPEAKER_00: 51:31

Yes. So I am realizing more and more that like nothing is more important than pouring into my family and our daughter and being fully present with her. So I'm doing that, and I'm also taking on this journey of learning permaculture and food forestry. We have like this beautiful plot of land that has so much potential for a food forest. We have some uh raspberries and blueberries planted and some fruit trees planted, but but then it's just lawn, it's just like grass and clover, and I'm looking at Pinterest at some of these like these food forests that we can create, and so that feels like a huge endeavor because I'm you know, it's all new to me to how can I learn how to nourish our family by growing our own food and tending to our soil and yeah, becoming more and more knowledgeable about just being self-reliant and self-sustaining and connected to the land and all of that and then and um and then I sprinkle in some uh work-related things. Like I have a podcast that I'm sure we'll talk more about on the next birth episode because it's collecting the most blissful birth stories on the planet, and I'm growing up for season two, but there's already a whole series of birth stories that anyone who wants to plant seeds in their mind and their consciousness of how blissful birth can be can go listen and just steep in these stories of what's possible.

SPEAKER_02: 53:36

So I just can you give us I won't go too into detail with it because we're running out of time, but I would love for you to just give a little bit of like definition to people of what you mean by blissful birth, because I feel like that term is so unknown to our society.

SPEAKER_00: 53:57

Hmm, this is so essential to understand yeah, what I mean when I say bliss, because when I say it in context of birth, what I mean is zero resistance, zero resistance is what I mean when I say bliss. Because when you're in zero resistance to birth or life, you can fully surrender into the now, into the now moment. And when you do that, you are like so absolutely intimately connected to spirit because spirit is here in the now, in the moment. And when you are connected to spirit and your heart is open and you're trusting that you know, it just like life gets better and better and better. We're on this upward spiral journey and we're loved and cared for and taken care of, and and the future generations are coming through with even more wisdom, and our body, like we can trust our body, who's literally done the like the cellular memory is hundreds and thousands of years old, like millions. And so if we can just if we could just get out of the way, bliss is like an access to get out of the way and reach this higher realm, which just means acceptance, almost like union, and then it it it's zero effort, and then it takes you into a blissful state when you can just be with what is in life and in birth, like one breath at a time. And so I'll just give a little not a not a spoiler alert, but a a glimpse into the next episode where my personal birth experience was completely blissful, there was no pain, it was intense, but so profoundly powerful. Like birth doesn't need to be, doesn't need to be this painful experience. It's actually not designed to be. And so yeah, it's a practice of this free fall backwards, like a trust fall into life. It's the ultimate opportunity to practice a trust fall. And when you do, when you really trust spirit, ooh, like the You never know what's gonna happen. The the fruits that you experience, you don't know. It's completely uncertain, and it's also beyond what you can imagine in the best way possible, so it's not just uncertain of like all possibilities. No, it's uncertain in beyond what you can imagine in the best way possible. So it's like it's this excitement versus fear. And when you take fear out of birth, out of life, it's not painful, it's it's this enjoyable experience. So yeah, it's super important to define bliss. It's it's yeah, it's not this, it's not as it's not ecstasy, like that's something I want to experiment play with my next birth, an ecstatic birth, bliss is just no resistance to the experience.

SPEAKER_02: 57:20

Yeah, because um most women go into it thinking that it's gonna like preparing themselves for this painful experience and this traumatizing experience, right? I I know that I've heard, I mean, I've never had a child, so I can't speak on my own experience, but I know that I've heard many women say things like, it was so painful, I don't even remember it, and stuff like that. And I I feel like this is like one of the many, many, many things that I just love about you is that literally everything in life, you find a way to make it blissful, and to you find a way to make it like in flow with your heart, and it it brings up another thought that was the reason that I chose to invest in working with you as a life coach was because your views on healing are to approach it in a non-forceful way, and I I know that you believe that like healing can happen in a graceful and beautiful way, and you don't have to like be experiencing all this horrible pain from the trauma in order to let it unfold and release from your system, and that has just like opened my mind in so many ways. Gentle, what it what do you call it? Gentle, gentle healing or something, right?

SPEAKER_00: 58:49

Yeah, like feminine, feminine, soft, gentle, loving. Yeah, it's very like loving.

SPEAKER_02: 58:57

Um, which is yeah, that's kind of where you go into like the inner child work and stuff, which is like a whole nother topic. I feel like I could just continue to talk with you for another hour on here.

SPEAKER_00: 59:10

I know, I know. Like mother, like mothering ourselves. It feels like this tender mother love that we offer ourselves, our inner child, are all parts of us, and then the the healing, it just it can be it can be sweet and gentle versus like really intense and painful.

SPEAKER_02: 59:29

Yeah, and that's just the way like that's something that you have gifted me is being able to see that life can be that way, that life doesn't have to be this challenge that we're constantly facing. And even though I do face a lot of challenges, I know that they're self induced now. And I know that I don't have to be doing that. And so, my I feel like a constant thing that I'm working on is how can I make it a more general. Experience and not have to feel like I have got all these things attacking me all the time.

SPEAKER_00: 1:00:09

Yeah. So that makes me so happy to hear.

SPEAKER_01: 1:00:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 1:00:14

Because I feel, yeah, I feel like it's part of my purpose to protect children, but not just actual children, our own inner children. So I'm like imagining how your inner child felt feels as you prioritize gentleness more and more and more. It's like she feels more safer and more secure to come out. And she's the source of our like innocence, creativity, flow, presence, you know, like fun, like big imagination. Like there's so many valuable things that our inner children can, we can still access through them. Um yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 1:00:58

So I love how I want to make sure I'm respecting your time. And I also want to ask if you would be willing to go into like what inner child work, like what does that mean talking about my inner child? Because I feel like even before working with you, I knew of inner child work, but I didn't really know it to the degree that like of what it really truly meant until starting to work with you. And if you have time to talk about it, I would love to, but if you don't, we can also save that for another time.

SPEAKER_00: 1:01:30

I think I think we should save it because it's such a I want to honor how big of a topic it is and how close it is to my heart. And I want to go in depth. So yeah, if we could do inner child and birth in the next one, two more episodes or or or one together.

SPEAKER_02: 1:01:47

Yeah, that's true because those go really ahead of time.

SPEAKER_00: 1:01:50

Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 1:01:51

Lots of that would be that okay. Yay. Well, I am so excited for our next one. And it's always such a delight to be able to talk with you and uh just to have you as a friend. We've been friends for what, like over 10 years now. I think we recently remembered. Yeah. And I think that you have, I think I've realized that you, I think you said this last time I saw you in person, is that uh that I you think I'm one of your like longest standing friendships. And I think it's the same. And I just I love that uh I love watching your life unfold in such beautiful ways. And I love that uh the friendship that we have, and I'm just so grateful for you.

SPEAKER_00: 1:02:37

Me too. And I'm so proud of you, and I'm so honored, and I'm so excited, and can't wait to be back on for another episode to bless your audience with not just my wisdom, but yours. That's why I slipped in a couple questions because I'm like, you have so much gold to share. And a lot of times I'll listen to podcasts and I want to know more about the the hosts. So I'm like, I love that we each got to share some golden nuggets today.

SPEAKER_02: 1:03:03

I love that, yeah. And then to the audience, too, if there's any questions that you have for me or Amanda, you can always like find us on socials and ask the question. You could leave a review on the podcast and even put a question in a review, and maybe we'll like touch on it in the next episode. That would be awesome. Or maybe in the next episode might be pre-recorded, but we'll touch on it in another one because I'm sure it'll we'll come back again. Yes, yeah. But Amanda, where can people follow you in your journey and especially like your blissful birth podcast? And yes, how can people see you?

SPEAKER_00: 1:03:43

Yeah, so the podcast is called Beyond Blissful Birth on all the podcast platforms, and we can also stay connected on Instagram, that's my main social media app. And the handle is Amanda Lumbroso. So, and Amber will put in the the links.

SPEAKER_02: 1:04:08

Yeah, I'll put in the in the notes. So well, thank you, Amanda, so much for chatting with me today. You're so welcome. I'm so happy to see you always, and we'll stay in touch, of course. Oh my gosh, isn't Amanda just such a doll? She is such a light, and I feel like I could talk to her for hours every time I talk to her. She's so lovely. Let's go over the biggest takeaways from the episode. Number one, love where you are to call in what's next. Number two, one of the bravest paths is walking without knowing exactly what's coming and being okay with that. Number three, ask yourself, is this nourishing me? Use this question for everything: friendships, work tasks, habits, social media. If something consistently drains you, it's a sign to shift, release, or redesign it so you can support your nervous system in your heart. Number four, boundaries reveal your real relationships. The alpha style of communication, clearly expressing how you feel and what you need without blame, is uncomfortable but powerful. It helps you stop people pleasing, speak from your heart, and show you who is meant to be in your life and who isn't. Number five, put self-care on your calendar first. I swear you guys, this is magic. Build your days around your well-being and then plug in your to-dos. You can time block, habit stack. Also, don't forget to allow your plans to shift when your body needs rest. It can create more flow and less burnout. Number six, redefine your relationship with social media. Overwhelm and comparison can really kill creativity. Maybe try deleting your apps from your phone like I did, and download them for just small windows when you need them or want to connect with others, and then you can delete them again. Number seven, money is just energy. Focus on what your deeper why is. Instead of obsessing over specific income numbers, clarify the life and the feelings that that life will bring you that you think that money will give you. Often pieces of that vision are already available now before you even hit the number. Number eight, healing can be gentle. You don't have to heal by reliving every trauma. There's a path of gentle healing that honors the nervous system, inner child, and just gives you more softness rather than force. Thank you again so much for tuning in today to the Authentic Heart Podcast. Again, my name is Amber Westerman. And if you really enjoyed this podcast, please leave a review. It really helps new growing podcasts. I'd be so grateful. And you can also subscribe to my email list, subscribe to the platform, and find me on socials. I am so excited to stay in touch with you guys and can't wait to share the next episode with y'all. Thank you.